UnityWall.com

Douglas Cantwell

Only through a Parents eyes...

The whole mindset of this nation needs to change to mold what is truely in the best interest of the child(ren).We live in a society where if it's good for one, it has to be good for all and in a society where selfishness and greed come first. We do not live in a society where what is best is being done for the child(ren). "And to the Republic for which it stands, One Nation, under God, indivisible with Liberty and Justice for all. "And Justice for All?"

We're lead to believe for the last two hundred and some years, that this meant each of us could count on and have faith in those words we pledged and saluted everyday, but that also has been taken from our child(ren) in schools. But now it is hopefully coming back for them to live by, but that's not what's happening. We live in a country we refer to as "Land of the Free". "Land of the Free", so long as we let the system decide for us "what's best."

If we as a society, could take the time to reflect on change and work together as parents, we could encourage more self-awareness, more selflessness. As seperated/divorced parents, we should "extend the Olive Branch", putting aside personal indifferences and bitterness, and focus on finding a common ground to provide TOGETHER equal guidance and stability for our child(ren) with the

understanding that how our child(ren) evolve through all of this is a direct reflection of us and how we approach this TOGETHER.

We should realize that the rights for our children shouldn't be set up as "dad's time/mom's time". It should be formed as "Their time/Our time." Child(ren) who are products of two family households should not be made to feel that their time with each parent has to be "SCHEDULED", or that they can only need their parents on the times set aside for them according to the system.

Family Values are not so much a question of debatable morals, but predominately a question of whether or not Congress is willing to stop destroying families at their economic base. Instead...allow families to grow and prosper, just like the Stock Market does under Free Market Capitalism. The only difference between the Stock Market and the Separation/Divorce Market is what we destroy when government destroys the Free Market.

The issue grows larger as the system evolves and creates more laws to determine what's best for the child(ren) regarding parental visitation, and it grows even larger when the system implements these laws. We need to try to change the minds of lawmakers who continue to create more laws concerning visitation rights. We need to reduce the continued power over what WE as the parents of our child(ren) should know as a "GIVEN".

These laws will only exacerbate the very dysfunctional family unit this country says they want to improve, leaving no room or possibility for familial integration for the sake of the child(ren). With the system continuing to be involved more and more in these situations, our Freedoms will be taken away from us and the rights for our future generations were all child(ren) need both parents.

The Courts of this land should, at the time of Seperating/Divorce, make it a given that both parents will provide equally for the child(ren) involved. As it stands, that option isn't even proposed to the Seperating/Divorcing parents.

Both parents should be able to give their child(ren) all they need physically,mentally, and emotionally without the interference of the Courts/System, if both parents have demonstrated continued efforts in providing such.

Imagine the future possibilities of our child(ren), if only parents could come together on this issue. If we could all agree that parenting is not something identified by scheduled visitation,weekly support, court judgements/orders.

Imagine the possibilities if we all could see that time, commitment, unconditional love, loyalty and guidance are what define a parent, not a court order....make that order a given at the time of filing of Seperation/Divorce. And make a "HOMERULE".. where the child(ren) have resided in the community the longest, and not alow a deviation of this to happen to affect the stability of the child(ren).

The average marriage in this nation lasts 7-9 years. Parenting is a life long endeavor. Let's encourage our Separated/Divorced parents who are willing to communicate for the benefit of our children to do so and not discourage them by making more laws that do not benefit our children.

Sincerely Douglas Cantwell